Category: Family

Sept. 23, 2024

I’M INSPIRED by the sharings of two of my favorite columnists.

Publio “Pubs” Briones wrote about reaching the golden age of 50 in his “On The Go” column last Saturday. He spoke of challenges with his eyesight and hairline in the funny piece, “What it’s like to be in my 50s.”

Melanie Lim, the day after, in her award-winning column, “Wide Awake,” and in a piece entitled, “Proof of Age,” spoke of a recent experience at a pharmacy when the guard wouldn’t believe that she’s a senior citizen. (Confession: Melanie was my UP Cebu College marketing professor, alongside my wife Jasmin.. and she’s the best. One more admission: I agree with the guard! I saw Melanie at the Press Freedom Week columnists’ night last week and she’s younger-looking than me and Pubs.)

Pubs and Melanie, aside from being SunStar writers, share one more passion. Both are runners. Pubs runs from Monday to Friday at the CCSC oval while Melanie has hurdled multiple half-marathons and will run the 25K in the 2025 Cebu Marathon.

So if Pubs turned 50 and Melanie is 60, I’m inspired to write about someone very, very, very close to me who’s more than a decade older.

She’s my mom Maria Elena “Allen” Castelo Zaldarriaga.. who, this May, will turn 75!

How young is she? Two days ago in Iloilo, she sent me a message with an all-smiling, all-sweating photo of her finishing a 7-km. run with the caption, “Bright 7K day!”

Yes, nearly three-quarters of a century old, my mom still has enough energy to outrun and outwork many 30-year-olds.

She founded our school, BRIGHT Academy / Play House Children’s Center, back in 1992. And though 32 years have passed, her love for her students is just as strong as it was when our family first converted a small garage into a classroom in Paradise Village.

My mom is often at the Bright Academy campus in Banilad as early as 7:15 a.m. and works tirelessly all day long. And what gives her extra power is her almost-daily exercise routine.

Walking/running is her favorite. On early (5:30 a.m.) Sunday mornings, she’d be at the Cebu Business Park to trek the winding roads for two hours. We’d message each other after and I’m often amazed that she’s outrun me with a farther distance.

Recently, she sent me this Viber message: “10 w/ 4… can you take a guess?”

I knew what it was: 10 kilometers including four bridges.

One of her goals is to run bridges around the world. And so in every city that my mom visits, she climbs the bridge. Golden Gate. Sydney Harbour. Brooklyn. London Bridge. She has also completed the half marathons in Singapore and Hong Kong. The three bridges (Cansaga-Marcelo Fernan-Mactan bridges) 25K event organized by Dr. Yong Larrazabal several years back? My mom has completed that.

Did I tell you she’ll be turning sweet 75 soon?

I think all of us can learn a couple of lessons from my mom.

First, enjoy what you do. “If you do what you love, you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” There is no more passionate person that I know of with children than my mom Allen.

Second.. “Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.” That’s a mantra that my mom lives by. And it shows in her physique; still very slim and fit at her age. (Another confession: My only gripe with my mom, because of her healthy eating habits, is that she did not take after her mom, our Lola Ita. Our Lola loved Coca-Cola and imparted this “Coke addiction” to all of her apos. My mom never drinks Coke.)

“You don’t stop running because you get old; you get old because you stop running.”

To my running idol.. I love you, MOM!

June 17, 2024

The Lord has gifted our family immensely. And of all the blessings that my sister Cheryl and brothers Charlie, Randy, Michael and I have received, none are greater than the gift of our amazing parents. My mom, Maria Elena “Allen,” and my dad, Manuel “Bunny,” were always there for us.

My dad taught me about sports. He pedaled a “racer” (as the road-bike was called in the ’70s). He jogged. He walloped that pelota racket. He exchanged tennis volleys with Monico Puentevella at the Negros Occidental Tennis Association (NOTA) courts in Bacolod.

He showed me the importance of a daily sweat. He lived it. He practiced the age-old adage: “A healthy body equals a healthy mind.”

Bunny Pages played basketball. No, he wasn’t in the PBA. That was his younger brother Ray, who wore the Crispa Redmanizers jersey. My dad joined BAPRO (Bacolod Professionals), a gathering of executives united by the same love of sport as Moses Malone and Paul Westhphal. This was in the 1970s and ‘80s and, as the eldest child, I’d tag along.

Six-foot-tall, my dad played the forward position and scored 23+ points; his corner jump-shot was unstoppable, like George Gervin’s.

Because of my dad’s regular dribbling and shooting, my brother Charlie and I played basketball. We joined the elementary varsity team.

One of my life’s most unforgettable moments was in our Intramurals in La Salle Bacolod. We were the underdogs and faced a team in the Finals composed of the best in Grade 7. The game was close and it came down to the last few seconds. I was fouled. Make both free throws and we win the championship; miss both attempts and we lose. The La Salle Gym was loud and jam-packed with high school and college students — and we were only in elementary! I was 13 years old then but this memory is forever etched in my mind’s eye. It was unbearable pressure.

Swish. Swish. We won.

The reason for all this? My dad. He recognized our passion for sports and built, at our backyard in Mountain View Subd., a half-court so that all-afternoon-long, after school, we’d dribble and practice lay-ups.

Each night, after Charlie and I would rush to finish our homework, we’d turn on the spotlights and play until our elbows ached and our necks stiffened.

Thanks to the green-painted, La Salle-themed court, our skills improved. Our elementary team (coached by an amazing mentor, Bob Coscolluela) won Bacolod’s overall championship. I was the point guard and was adjudged the MVP.

I cite this example because it’s personal. And as a father to my (and Jasmin’s) daughter Jana, I look back at what my dad did and applied the many learnings I’ve accumulated. (Jana herself turned out to be quite an athlete: a former No.4 junior tennis champ and Ateneo de Manila Univ. team captain.)

My dad Bunny and mom Allen were always there. Always. Always. Always. Always. In basketball contests, tennis matches, declamation performances, PTA meetings—in everything that had to do with their most-loved possessions, their children… they were present.

Be present. Remember that presence is more important than gifts. Children spell love… T-I-M-E. Our life here on earth will be measured by how much time we spent with our children. I believe in this formula: the amount of time you spend with your children is commensurate to how good your children will become. Trust me on this. That’s what I’ve experienced with my own parents.

More time + attention = Better children.

Sports? Above all things, this is one activity where you and your children will bond best. Sport means playing. And don’t children love to play? Find the game that your child enjoys. Jog together. Swim. The more time you and your child spend playing, the healthier you become; the healthier your relationship.

To my dad Bunny… I love you! Thanks to your childhood present—that basketball court—and to your presence. Happy Father’s Day!

I was scouring through my past Sun.Star articles when I stumbled upon this March 18, 2007 piece (which I slightly edited) that’s as relevant today as it was eight summers ago:

When I grew up as a young boy in Bacolod City in the 1970s, our family owned one 14-inch black-and-white TV set. Voltes V was my favorite show. I also loved how Popeye gobbled up that can of spinach, turned muscular, punched Brutus, then won over Olive. How often did I sit fronting the boob tube? Once a week. For 30 minutes. Maybe less.

The PlayStation 4 did not exist. The XBox 360 wasn’t produced by Bill Gates. Instagram wasn’t invented. (Mark Zuckerberg wasn’t even born yet!) The iPod was a thick box with a cassette tape twirling inside named Walkman. The Internet? It was decades away and the only “surfing” people understood was on the beach above a surfboard.

That was the 1970s. Today, young ones clasp with 10 fingers the iPhone. Cable channels boast of thousands of TV shows. Today, six-year-olds do “txtng” with their eyes closed.

What has this made the world? It has made our children fat. Lazy. It has made them think less. Sweat less. Do less. It has made them crawl to the computer to chat with their friend instead of calling and talking over a landline for two hours. It has made our children reclusive. Introverts. Like turtles, they turn inside their shells, inside their rooms, inside their computers, inside their Facebook accounts. Take this example: Instead of going out to join a karate class, today’s children would rather play a martial arts video game.

Sad? Very, very sad. So here we are, once more, back in this season called Summer. The question is asked of every parent, “What do I let my children do?”

My advice? Go out. During the next 60 days, when the sun is burning and the skies are light blue and it’s 36 degrees outside and the clouds are puffy and white — take your child out. Literally. Take her out.

Enroll your son on an aikido program. Buy him those white martial arts overalls, let him kick, jump, block and punch. Let him do all those acts in front of a teacher, beside other children — and not on some Android game.

Go out. Enroll her in a swimming program. Basketball? Badminton? Tennis? Football? Bowling? Every sport that has a field or a pool or a court or an alley will have a summer program. What to join? It’s all up to you. It’s all up to your child.

Not interested in sports? No problem. There are other choices available: classes for painting, cooking, dancing, acting. The point is obvious: Before June arrives and the next thing you realize is your daughter has memorized all the TV shows, do something. Plan out her summer today.

Go out. I know, I know. Very often, the words “summer” and “expensive” are synonyms. That’s true. But you can also be creative.

When I was no older than 9, my dad Bunny and mom Allen did the wisest move any parent can do: They bought me an inexpensive bike. And so I biked. Each morning, I pedaled. Each afternoon, I pedaled. Together with my brother Charlie and our neighbors, we drove our BMX bikes, cycled nonstop, raced the asphalted roads, scouted for “damang” (or “kaka,” as  spiders are called in Ilonggo) crawling the electric lines; we shot hoops at the village court and pulled our “tiradors” (slingshots) to target birds. We weren’t inside. We were out.

Finally, here’s one last tip: Summer’s the perfect time to bond with your child. Buy a plastic kite and drive to the Family Park. Throw the kite up in the air while your son maneuvers it upward.

You play golf? And want your daughter to learn the game? Enroll her in a JunGolf program. Drop her at the morning’s start. Pick her up. Compliment her swing. And when she’s good enough to play a few holes, be her partner. Or her caddy. By summer’s end, guess what: Your daughter will be all-smiles, tanned, tired. And she’d have found a new best friend named Dad.

It was 50 golden years ago today, on March 5, 1965, when one man, who started with the humblest of beginnings as a security guard, founded what would become one of the country’s most outstanding security providers.

That man was Jacinto Mariano Natividad Villarosa Mendez and that company is Centurion Security Agency, Inc.

Few companies reach 50 years. Few men were like Jack. He worked as a kargador. He’d ride a rickety boat with his father from Bohol to Cebu to transport wood. While in law school at USC, he borrowed books to study. After passing the bar, he survived the hardships of little money by wearing a blue uniform with a gun tucked in his side pocket.

He started as a guard. Then, years later and armed with that first-hand experience, he founded Centurion Security Agency, Inc. with a vow to transform the then-rugged and scary image of a “sikyo” into that of a true “security professional.”

He succeeded. From one guard, Centurion reached a peak of 1,500 security professionals. Today, it has a thousand. On numerous times, CSAI was awarded by the police as one of the nation’s top agencies.

Speaking of longevity, the company has established long relations not only with clients and companies but also with their dutiful and devoted employees. One guard has been with Centurion for over 34 years. There are several fathers-and-sons working for Centurion; a father would start as a guard in his early twenties, he’d got married, raise children — and one or two of those boys would go on to follow their dad, saluting customers and ensuring an establishment’s safety.

Today, fifty years since Centurion’s founding, is both a happy and sad day for the family I’ve come to call my own: the Mendez family — which includes my wife Jasmin, the second of four children.

Happy because fifty years, as explained by ace business writer Mia Aznar in her piece yesterday, is “half-century” old.

Fifty years is fifty years. That’s a long time ago. We weren’t even born that year when movies Dr. Zhivago and The Sound of Music were shown. Happy because when you look back at how the company has helped tens of thousands of people through the years, through employment or because establishments have become safer due to Centurion’s front-line security, you smile and feel fulfilled.

Today is also a somber day. It’s bittersweet for the Mendez family — which include my mother-in-law Malu and Jasmin’s siblings, Michelle, Jake and Monette — because the founder and CEO himself, the funnyman Jack Mendez whom everybody loved, passed away just eight months ago.

For years, he longed to see his baby turn 50. He had grand plans with Centurion joining a hundred-force squadron of Centurions, marching and saluting the crowd during the Sinulog. If only he’d be with us today… His sudden passing last July 15, on a beautiful morning that transformed into the darkest of evenings for the family that night, was painful.

Though he was already 82 and had lived the fullest of lives — from being Rotary president to being Ubay, Bohol’s benefactor to being a devout Catholic and a generous and caring dad to his four children — his passing stunned the family.

But today we celebrate as he wants us to celebrate. For Jack was a man who laughed. He laughed a lot. He made people laugh. And his legacy lives on with the company he founded whose motto reads, “The best of pay to the best of companies offering the best service — The best service wins!”

Dad, The Centurion, happy golden anniversary.

We were supposed to travel together this November. A lifelong boxing fan, he followed Manny Pacquiao’s every jab and uppercut. We planned to fly to Hong Kong, hop on the fast ferry to the gambling island then set-up camp inside one of the suites of The Venetian Macao.

Jacinto Mariano Natividad Villarosa Mendez, or “Jack” to the tens of thousands of people who know him, won’t make the trip to watch Pacman. No worries. Instead of a seat inside the Cotai Arena, he’ll have unobstructed front-row seats from high above, seated alongside his buddies like Kits Borromeo, Dito Bugarin, Toto Gallego and his brother Tony — with an unlimited supply of Carlos Uno on his side.

Jack Mendez, my beloved father-in-law, the man I’ve known for over half my life, passed away Tuesday last week. He was to turn 83 years old this August 17.

He left us, to those who’ve met him and laughed with him and heard his impromptu speeches that were always the most applauded — he left us all better people.

Jack’s story is amazing. Born poor, he struggled to study. In college and in law school at the USC, his pants were often torn and he borrowed books. The dean of the USC Law School disallowed him from taking the Bar Exam for fear that he’d fail and would lower the school’s passing rate. He stormed Dean Pelaez’s office and slammed a hand grenade on the table.

He took the test, passed it, became Atty. Jacinto V. Mendez. But still poor, he worked as a security guard. One of his assignments in Manila was to guard a furniture factory where he had to scoot on top of a table to avoid the crawling snakes that wandered all night.

On March 1965, he founded the Centurion Security Agency, Inc. and it went on to become one of the biggest agencies (with over 2,000 guards) in Vis-Min. Counting the years, this March would have been Centurion’s 50th anniversary.

How dad, whom we were ready to nickname, “The Man With the Golden Gun,” longed to attend his baby’s golden celebration. But, no, God has better plans. He wanted his son Jack beside Him early — to be with Him for eternity.

I consider Jack not only as a role model and mentor — but as a best friend. We had the best of times together. Each Saturday dinner that we enjoyed, each trip that we took as a family, each trek to Dumaguete or Iloilo or Bohol that we took so he could watch his granddaughter’s tennis matches — each moment we savored.

As every Rotarian or lawyer-friend or SSS co-employee would attest, he was jolly. He’d make jokes all night. He was witty and articulate. He loved to hold the microphone and tell the funniest of stories.

He was loved. By his family, above all, led by my mother-in-law Malu, and the children, Michelle, Jasmin, Jake and Monette. By his Centurion family. As example, the day after he passed away, the Head Guards group were so shocked and moved by his sudden passing that, never mind their limited resources, they donated a substantial amount of their hard-earned salary to the Mendez family. This is love. Jack’s love returning because of his kindness.

One of dad’s mottos is GOLF: “Growing Old, Living Fine.” He lived a fine and fulfilling life. Another saying that he held dear was the 5Fs. In life, he said, we must follow these 5Fs… First, faith. God above everything else. Next, family. Third F: finances. Fourth, friends. And last, Fun.

Faith. Family. Finances. Friends. Fun. “It should be according to sequence,” he’d say. “Never, for example, finances over family or fun over friends.”

I add a sixth F in his honor: Father. He was an always-present, very thoughtful, and giving father.

This morning at 10, a mass will be celebrated at the San Isidro Parish Church in Talamban with the interment to follow at Cempark. We will lay to rest a man who loved to the fullest, laughed every problem away, rose from rags to riches with humility; a man who could make the most serious of frowns smile, who commandeered a squadron of centurions.

Jack The Centurion, we salute you. Dad, we’ll miss you.

If you type the word “shangri-la” in the online thesaurus, plenty of words appear. There’s “bliss,” “heaven” and “promised land.” There’s “seventh heaven,” “garden” and “paradise.”

Having recently stayed for two nights at the Shangri-La’s Mactan Resort and Spa, I’d conclude that, yes, those words are accurate. For here we have, in our very own Cebu, one of the most coveted resorts in the entire Philippines and around Asia.

Jasmin, Jana and myself—our family of three Js—booked a Friday noon to Sunday afternoon stay a month ago. School had not started yet and, what perfect way for a getaway. Plus, our top resort had a fantastic promotion: Book for two nights and, as reward, they’ll give the third night… for free.

There’s more. A free P1,000 voucher that’s consumable in any of their several restaurants—Tides, Acqua, Buko Bar & Grill, Cowrie Cove, and Tea of Spring. And here are two more that my 10-year-old daughter, Jana Marie, enjoyed the most: a 15-minute ride on their jet-ski (free!) and a two-hour access to a children’s paradise of stairs and slides called Adventure Zone. Daily buffet breakfast for two (plus two children) at either Tides or Acqua are all included in the package. (For those still interested, this “Local Residents Package,” which started in June 1, lasts until August 31, 2009.)